I am dismayed. I am heartbroken. I am distressed. The latest shenanigans in Washington lay bare the chasm that exists between the male-driven political system in Washington and the collective female-experience in America. True: Women have come a long way in our country. We can vote (only after suffragettes had to claw and scrape our way to the polls). We can get a credit card now without father’s or husband’s approval/support and signatures. We can own a home, a car, etc., without a man signing for it. We no longer have to marry to live acceptably in society. And, we can openly live in any sort of relationship we wish, be it hetero, homo, or a –sexual. But, language that describes our often negative walk in life is still passive and still deflects the negative impact men can have in our lives.
And, if you happen to have kept a sexual assault a secret for many years, it is now acknowledged publicly that perhaps it never happened After all, if a woman is assaulted, what are some of the first questions? Why were you there? Why were you with “him”? Why didn’t you run home and tell your parents? Why didn’t you go to a police station and tell the men? What were you thinking?
I was taught by my mother that “I hold the key.” If someone gets to me (my p#$$&, a la Trump), it must be because I opened myself willingly. If someone hurts me, it is because my dress was too short, or my top too low, or because I went willingly to some place I should not have gone. So, therefore, if anything happens to me, it is my fault. After all, boys will be boys, men are just men, and we can’t really blame them for doing what God made them to do. Ouch! Really?…
And so, for the last couple of weeks, we’ve watched and listened to our senate judiciary committee be American “boys.” The “Boys Club” was there for all to see. The suggestion that a man serve on the Supreme Court must be an assumption and nothing in his life should call into question his character or deter him from the “right” to serve on the court. No investigation needed. This woman is mistaken. If she was there, whatever happened was her own damn fault. And why in God’s name did she not run to the police and report the incident? Thirty-six years ago, male police did such a good job dealing with these things. Rapists and men who assaulted girls were always prosecuted, right? No one ever made the victim the focus and put them through hell…right? Harrumph!
This woman who came forward with concerns was just a stunt…or perhaps, forgive me, just another c%^& (again, a la Trump) who would upturn a man’s life! No need to search for the truth because the assumption among the men is always that it is somehow the woman’s fault…right? Apparently so.
So I am distressed and dismayed. I am appalled that those MEN who are our elected representatives do not represent us. They represent their party, their tribe, the predominantly male-focused party who believes in the status quo, that victory belongs to the guys, and that any woman who stands in the way can and should be done away with. After all, what is it that their president said…and they apparently agree with? Just grab em all by the p^$$#…they like it…men can get away with it.